You may know Dave online at AOL as his Gor alter-eogs. . .Dorc Sage or Master Strap-on. I guess that Master Stap-on was killed at some point because now he's using Dorc Sage to mess up the fun of other people onlinre. He's totally full of crap and here are some highlihghts from his life, or at least what I think his life must have been like.
| A dark day for us all. | Dave is born. (I'm guessing his parents were related or just did something to make God mad.) |
| 6th Grade. | Dave is kidnapped by aliens. He is returned because the aliens decided they wanted a fully human subjject. (Dave still has a large zipper in the back of his head from this incident.) |
| Junior year of High school. | Dave's first blow job. (Dave comments that it didn't taste all that bad.) |
| Age 24. | Dave attempts to get into the Guiness Book of World records by putting both of his feet in his mouth and then inserting his head up his ass. (Dave is disqualified after it is revealed he was born this way.) |
| A dark day for everyone online. | Dave discovers AOL and Gor. (Dave is elated by this discovery. The net has free pictures of naked people, and naked animals, and naked plants, and naked rocks.) |
| Age 29. | Dave's right hand is operated on for carpal tunnel syndrome. (Dave claims it's from typing. Dave does NOT use his right hand to type with.) |
| Present day. | Dave has fucked up the lives of five women. Two by getting them pregnant and then dumping them. Two othersare the lives of his duaghters who he ignores in favor of cruising parks and trying to fool more women online. The last is his mother. Dave lives for free at home and doesn't help in any way. His mom is his source of income. (Dave just sucks!) |
From rumor and guessing this is what I think has made Dave the world class jack-off he is today. I will add to this as I hear more or just think it up.